When it comes to being an effective communicator and influencing others, there are two important steps you need to take. Step #1 is the most important. Most people skip it and only do Step #2.
Last week I shared a post at my Google Plus Trial Lawyer Tips Community briefly discussing this issue with 800+ other lawyers. Today, I want to make sure that you also know about these two important communication steps. Using both of these steps is critically important regardless of whether you want to win your next jury trial or need to make a challenging sales pitch and close your next deal.
These two important steps (especially the step most people miss) will help you become a more effective communicator and help make sure that your message is fully appreciated by the audience. These two steps will help you get your audience sitting on the edge of their seats and waiting in anticipation to hear your entire message. Go about things the right way and these two steps will substantially increase the odds of your audience taking the desired action.
Ready to find out what these two critically important steps are? Do you want to know why you need to use both of these two steps each time you tell your story, develop rapport, and build trust with your audience of 1 or 5,000?
Well, before I answer these questions I have a little hint for you. I used Step #1, the most neglected step, to start this post off. Did it work? Did I motivate you to keep reading?
Step #1
The first and most important step in the communication process and, the step that most people miss, is as follows: You need to give your audience a reason WHY they should take the action you desire.
In a jury trial, my first priority is to give the jury specific reasons WHY they should want my client to win. I want them to feel the need to hold a bad defendant accountable for his wrongful conduct and right a wrong. I spend time showing them the hardship my client is now suffering and how his life has been turned upside down. I present evidence allowing the jury to have empathy for my client’s situation caused by the defendant’s reckless conduct. I make it very clear why they should be on our side.
In your situation and, regardless of what you are selling (a product, service or idea), you need to give your audience a reason WHY they would want to take action. For example, in my opening paragraphs to this post, I tried to show you WHY you may want to finish reading this post before sharing my specific two steps. I (hopefully) persuaded you to take a look at my two steps so that your work and effort has purpose and will be appreciated and not be ignored. I’m hoping that you would like to have your audience sitting at the edge of their seats in anticipation. I wanted you to keep reading and have an interest in learning more about Steps #1 and #2.
Only after showing you the WHY did we then migrate to the second step.
Step #2
The second step shows your audience HOW the facts, rules or evidence support them doing what you are asking them to do.
For example, in a jury trial, after I have given my jury a reason WHY they should want my client to win (the defendant should be held accountable for his wrongful and illegal conduct- drunk drivers who harm others should be held accountable), I then show them the road map about HOW the law supports the jury’s finding in my client’s favor. I use opening statement, witnesses, experts, exhibits, closing arguments, and jury instructions to do this.
Another way of looking at these two steps might be as follows. Let’s say you need to convince everyone in your family to drop what they’re doing and take a last minute weekend trip from Los Angles to Lake Arrowhead for Uncle Louie’s 60th birthday. Step #2 (the options and details as to HOW you get there) might be a map or GPS instructions describing which roads to travel to make it to your destination. The HOW also includes the type of vehicle to drive, who’s driving, when to leave, street names and directions. These are your rules, standards and evidence. That’s your HOW.
The fact that you will be celebrating Uncle Louie’s 60th birthday and meeting your cousins and close friends is the WHY in Step #1. That’s the reason everyone is willing to drive in heavy stop and go traffic on a busy Friday afternoon to make the trip. Spend time discussing the WHY in Step #1 with your family and the chances are good that everyone will put aside their prior weekend plans, overlook the inconvenience of driving in heavy traffic, and use the HOW in Step #2 to make this last minute trip happen.
Advanced Steps
If you really want to get creative and raise the bar, use these 5 sub-steps within both Step #1 and Step #2. To have impact and make a lasting impression, use metaphors and context to convince in Step #1 and “rules of the road” in Step #2.
Conclusion
Don’t feel too bad if you didn’t know about or haven’t been focusing on the first step. Over the years I’ve observed many lawyers who also happen to be brilliant scholars and legal technicians fail to persuade a jury to take action. They spend almost 100% of their time focusing on Step #2 (the HOW) discussing the law and procedure. They spend little if any time on the WHY in step #1.
For all you non-lawyers out there, when making your presentation to 1 or 5,000, my suggestion would be to focus 80% on the WHY in Step #1 and 20% on HOW in Step #2. Using these two steps will allow you motivate your audience and get them to pay attention. Incorporate the advanced steps into the mix and before you know it, they’ll be sitting on the edge of their seats and looking forward to helping you any way they can.